Contemplations About Dress Codes and Social Identity
"Dress to Impress" or What Your Clothing Choices Reveal About You
I find the interplay between societal norms and personal/social identity absolutely fascinating.
The construction and acceptance of social norms in itself is intriguing. Let’s take the example of clothing. We have collectively agreed on all sorts of implicit codes on what to wear in various contexts. Sticking to those codes generally demonstrates that you’re aware of the code and that you adopt it to become part of the respective “in-group”. Like wearing a neat suit in a business meeting. Wearing jeans and a t-shirt would mean you’re either ignorant of the code and therefore an “outsider” (e.g. you’re a construction worker and don’t even own a suit) or you’re “too cool” to conform and proactively break the rule. Basically implicitly saying that you don’t care to be member of that in-group - which is what tech people often do by wearing shorts and flip flops in corporate environments. They know they can get away with it because corporates depend on their skill set.
Interestingly, even people who break conventions mostly don’t do it purely as a statement of individuality but mostly as an act of stating membership of a different in-group. Like gothic style people demonstrating that they’re not part of the mainstream but at the same time revealing that they are part of another group, namely the gothic folks.
Once during a Berlin party night, I somewhat accidentally ended up at a burlesque theme party. I was wearing a flowery summer dress from earlier in the day. Never knew a summer dress could make one feel so inappropriately dressed!
It’s somewhat amusing how random most clothing norms are, but yet how serious they are taken by many people and how ignorance does indeed close doors to certain social circles at times. Like a semi secrete language of groups and elites.
And at the same time, the people who are at the top of whatever social order we’re looking at, sometimes care least to follow the norms. Like the super rich grandfather of a friend of mine who would wear the same wool sweater no matter where he went.
I’ve found it also interesting to have a look at my own relationship with clothing norms. I used to be overly concerned to wear the right clothes for the right occasion. Always properly dressed in neat and tidy clothes, usually no bold colors or patterns. I do think that back then I was more concerned about fitting into certain social circles and moving up an imaginary career ladder.
Living and visiting places like India, Berlin, Tulum definitely opened my eyes to the beauty of bright colors and eccentric styles. Moving in social circles that I had previously considered posh and desirable, and then being disenchanted by them, made me care less about demonstrating my in-group membership. And I’d say with age I’ve just become more confident being myself and wearing what I actually find beautiful. I also noticed my inner trickster coming to the forefront; by sometimes wearing clothes that are slightly inappropriate for the context, feeling a little nervous but excited to wear the outfit, and curiously observing people’s reactions.
But yet, you cannot NOT communicate through your choice of clothing. If nowadays I sometimes wear leopard leggings in a local supermarket, I do indirectly say something along the lines of “I’m a psychedelic hipster”. And I still feel social anxiety wearing my favorite spunky clothes in certain contexts. As a university teacher, I may wear more bold clothes than I used to (like green suit pants), but I still wouldn’t wear my beloved neo-shamanic tunic. Wearing unusual clothes around my dad is an edge for me, too!
In the bottom line, the entire topic is just something I find intriguing to consider. I’m aware it’s a tricky topic in some instances, like clothing norms that impact women’s rights (e.g. headscarves). But it’s also an interesting area to stretch one’s boundaries and play around with how it feels to be more/less appropriately dressed for a specific context.
Curious to hear your own observations and experiences! Where’s your edge around clothing? Which norms do you find weird/funny/enraging?